Roth Misses Brown Out by Just a Few Steps

Scoring 17 runs in the first inning of Tuesday nights opening game pretty much says it all. Double wide Express definitely did not see us coming. Which brings up something that Roth did not see coming in the first inning of the second game against Ballz Deep. Roth went scrambling across the outfield after one out, leaving enough room in the outfield for Ballz Deep to put together some hits for extra bases and score a few runs. Roth was hit with an unexpected round of irritable bowel syndrome. I think in the interest of team loyalty, he should have pooped his pants. That would have been the true Dead Money way...pooping your pants, yes, that has Dead Money written all over it.

As I was writing this I began to think of some poop slang:
butt loaf
brown trout
food baby
tootsie roll
poo poo butter
mud butt
chunky fart

Any one else care to try?

Visions of a Collision

Tuesday nights games went as well a could have been expected. We win both even after a collision in the outfield between our two center fielders. The out was made and both walked away from the incident, though they both played the rest of the game at different positions. V may have suffered a minor concussion but still managed to go 3 for 3 in his following at bats. I am of the opinion that we may have to thump him on the head before every game.

The first game was against the Wild Turkeys, our arch rivals from last season. They started the game off hot taking a 8-1 lead. However this put us in a position that we have become accustomed to, and thrive on. We made our fourth comeback of the season and won the game. I have to admit, I'm a little saddened by the Wild Turkeys performance so far this season. I was really hoping that we would have a heated rivalry leading into the end of the season, but the Turkeys seem to be pulling up the rear of the league. Make us proud Turkeys, turn around the rest of your season.

Elite Exteriors was anything but elite. They do have a tendency towards hitting the long ball, but come up short when put up against the defending spring and summer champs. They were undefeated going into Tuesday night, and left their double header with two losses.

Wanted: Coon Dog

Dead Money is searching for a well trained Coon Hound. This dog must be able to track, tree a Coon, be a good swimmer, and also be clever. The necessity for a Coon Hound has been apparent since the first week of play. We have used more modern approaches for hunting Coon, such as: phone calls, text messages, and emails. I have even seen evidence of the use of Facebook. All have failed miserably. So, a more traditional approach seems to be the way to go.

We have two games tonight. One against the under achieving Wild Turkeys, and the other against an unknown and undefeated Elite Exteriors. Need to bring the "A" game tonight. We know the Turkeys will be trying desperately for their first win of the season.

Where are you Tom Coon?

Smashing Game! Banner Night!

Tuesday night was reminiscent of last years Dead Money season. We forced the use of the flip-flop rule after the fifth inning. The whole team hit well, using the entire field. Sean had his break out game, (no pun intended) with a flurry of hits, including his first HR of the year. A homer that shattered the windshield of a parked car! Note: Do not park your car facing the field. Acker was the third player on the roster to add a HROL to his stats.

The banner was unveiled for the first time. Despite a bit of discussion about who would be the ones to hang it up, and a few players "warming up" for the first time in thier softball career, some of us were able to endure the embarrassment and get it hung up. I must say it is a rather impressive banner. We are definitly pioneers. That is one thing that I have never seen before. It is way better than wheely bags! I was surprised to get very little reaction. We may need to rethink our choice of location...maybe on the back side of the back stop.

Comeback Kids!!!

After a lengthy offseason, Dead Money has begun regular play in both leagues. I would have liked to continue blogging during our time off, but it seems that this author has performance issues without any controvercy to fuel his typing and increase his wpm. So I've waited for our first few games to begin before posting anything. And without disappointment, our early season games have been full of drama!

The first display of controversy began within the Dead Money roster. However, I am going to withhold airing the teams dirty laundry and my own personal opinions.

The second came from none other than Alliance/Miken!!! It was expected that the former 2nd baseman turned 3rd baseman would once again be unable to keep his mouth shut! He seems hell bent on displaying his douche status. It has been decided that he is a full blown, without a question, top 10 douchebag. I'm not sure what the final score was, but it was a complete blowout...one of those games where a score book wasn't needed. I would like to officially point out that the 3rd baseman hit into two double plays...no, not one...TWO!!! That's when he called us "cupcakes". Douche.

On a positive note, we have been making some incredible comebacks!!! We've been down by a substatial margin in almost every game and been able to make Ali like, comebacks. It's been beautiful! Some very fun competition!